Recently I made a BIG move in my life — a choice to relocate my family. It was a HUGE undertaking that took a lot of COURAGE on my part (as well as a lot of support from family and friends to make it happen). In the process, I encountered many obstacles — some real, some imagined (LOL!), some planned for and some that completely blind sighted me.
So…I am HERE now.
Or, I was the other day. (Ha ha ha!) But seriously…after the hub-bub of the initial move was over, I found myself feeling misplaced. My whole life had literally been transported and the life I knew — the friends, the places, the things — were gone, and suddenly replaced by new people, places, and things that were unfamiliar and new.
Where was MY place in this all? It was a surreal experience altogether and for more than a hot minute, I questioned my choice and my ability to confidently follow through with my vision for our new life.
What the HELL? I had put so much energy and effort into making this new phase of my life happen and now that it was HERE, part of me wanted to curl up and hide under the covers for a month.
Not the smoothest transition for me, but probably not the worst either. I knew that I wanted to really SHOW UP and make the most of this experience, but I had gotten into some bad habits during the move that were getting in the way of me showing up as my BEST self. Mainly, I was waaaaay out of rhythm.
Ayurveda (EYE-your-VAY-da), the sister science to Yoga, teaches us that when we are out of rhythm, we suffer, and boy is that the truth! During the weeks leading up to and during the move, I was eating at irregular times, staying up late, eating a later, heavier dinner, and not getting up early enough to really start my day right. These might sound like no big deal, and honestly 2 years ago, I might not have thought so either, but after experiencing the EASE that comes from being IN rhythm, being OUT of rhythm was seriously PAINFUL — physically, mentally, and emotionally.
The price I paid for disregarding my body’s wisdom was REAL!
So what to do? First…I knew I had to get REAL here and get HONEST about what wasn’t working. Then, do the hard work of steering back in the right direction. That’s the hard part, though, right? When you find yourself in a position where you’ve already screwed up, sometimes it’s easier to just let it go than do the work of getting back on track. It’s called the “what-the-hell” effect. Ever heard of it?
“The what-the-hell effect is the feeling you get when you’ve already exceeded your preset limit and feel that since you’ve already failed, you might as well fail spectacularly…
…When you miss a goal or exceed a limit, be gentle on yourself. Don’t catastrophize. Armed with this knowledge and awareness, you’ll be able to make better, more informed choices as you move forward.”
It’s a REAL thing!!! You can read more about it in this short article by Eric Ravenscraft at LifeHacker.com HERE.
I’m sure you’ve had your own “what-the-hell” experiences. Sadly, it’s easy to keep going down that path and find yourself way, way off track. That’s how to devolve into a lesser version of yourself over time — NOT my recommendation.
If you don’t want to go down the path of regression/stagnation, you have to make a real effort to start right HERE where you currently are and pick the lowest hanging fruit that moves you in the direction you want to go.
5 Steps to Steer You Back On Track…
- Honestly recognize where you are and that it’s not where you want to be (but DON’T stay stuck there, move on to step 2).
- Know what you want to be different. What new habit would you like to have?
- Acknowledge the GAP between where you currently are and where you want to be and the fact that your daily habits have gotten you here.
- Know that you can CHANGE your habits.
- Ask yourself this question and be patient for the answer to arise: What New Thing Do You Need to Believe About Yourself In Order to Adopt Your New Habit?
- Write it down EVERYWHERE — put it on your computer desktop, your planner, your bathroom mirror, your refrigerator, your phone wallpaper, and anywhere else that you are guaranteed to look throughout your day.
- BELIEVE IT!
- An example of a new belief might be: “I choose to listen to my body.” or “I have the power to design my life.” or “The way I eat nourishes my body.” If you’re having trouble coming up with a new belief to support your new habit, let me help you! Click the link at the end of this post to set up a time to talk to me!
What we believe about ourselves creates our daily habits, and our daily habits define us to the world, and then that’s reflected back to us by the people we interact with. So, literally…
Our thoughts about ourselves make the difference in who we are. They have the potential to either help us EVOLVE into more confident, loving, healthy people inside and out OR to keep us locked into all of the negative patterns that lead to our ruin.
It starts with just being HERE — being present with what IS with honesty and self-compassion.
When you sit with WHAT IS, what comes up for you? What’s not working that needs your honest, loving attention? What do you want to be different?
I want to know! Comment below or schedule a time to talk to me HERE.